much for me？ I thought he
would。 He wouldn't begrudge me this： giving just a small bit of love he didn't
want to my friend Jacob。
After all； it wasn't the same love at all。
Jake pressed his warm cheek against the top of my hair。
If I turned my face to the side—if I pressed my lips against his bare
shoulder。。。 I knew without any doubt
what would follow。 It would be very easy。 There would be no need for
explanations tonight。
But could I do it？ Could I betray my absent heart to save my pathetic life？
Butterflies assaulted my stomach as I thought of turning my head。
And then； as clearly as if I were in immediate danger； Edward's velvet voice
whispered in my ear。
〃Be happy；〃 he told me。
I froze。
Jacob felt me stiffen and released me automatically； reaching for the door。
Wait； I wanted to say。 Just a minute。 But I was still locked in place；
listening to the echo of Edward's
voice in my head。
Storm…cooled air blew through the cab of the truck。
〃OH！〃 The breath whooshed out of Jacob like someone had punched him in the
gut。 〃Holy crap！〃
He slammed the door and twisted the keys in the ignition at the same moment。
His hands were shaking
so hard I didn't know how he managed it。
〃What's wrong？〃
He revved the engine too fast； it sputtered and faltered。
〃Vampire；〃 he spit out。
The blood rushed from my head and left me dizzy。 〃How do you know？〃
〃Because I can smell it。 Dammit！〃
Jacob's eyes were wild； raking the dark street。 He barely seemed aware of the
tremors that were rolling
through his body。 〃Phase or get her out of here？〃 he hissed at himself。
He looked down at me for a split second； taking in my horror…struck eyes and
white face； and then he
was scanning the street again。 〃Right。 Get you out。〃
The engine caught with a roar。 The tires squealed as he spun the truck around；
turning toward our only
escape。 The headlights washed across the pavement； lit the front line of the
black forest； and finally
glinted off a car parked across the street from my house。
〃Stop！〃 I gasped。
It was a black car—a car I knew。 I might be the furthest thing from an
autophile； but I could tell you
everything about that particular car。 It was a Mercedes S55 AMG。 I knew the
horsepower and the color
of the interior。 I knew the feel of the powerful engine purring through the
frame。 I knew the rich smell of
the leather seats and the way the extra…dark tint made noon look like dusk
through those windows。
It was Carlisle's car。
〃Stop！〃 I cried again； louder this time； because Jacob was gunning the truck
down the street。
〃What？！〃
〃It's not Victoria。 Stop； stop！ I want to go back。〃
He stomped on the brake so hard I had to catch myself against the dashboard。
〃What？〃 he asked again； aghast。 He stared at me with horror in his eyes。
〃It's Carlisle's car！ It's the Cullens。 I know it。〃
He watched dawn break across my face； and a violent tremor rocked his frame。
〃Hey； calm down； Jake。 It's okay。 No danger； see？ Relax。〃
〃Yeah； calm；〃 he panted； putting his head down and closing his eyes。 While he
concentrated on not
exploding into a wolf； I stared out the back window at the black car。
It was just Carlisle； I told myself。 Don't expect anything more。 Maybe Esme
Stop right there； I told
myself。 Just Carlisle。 That was plenty。 More than I'd ever hoped to have
again。
〃There's a vampire in your house；〃 Jacob hissed。 〃And you want to go back？〃
I glanced at him； ripping my unwilling eyes off the Mercedes—terrified that
it would disappear the second
I looked away。
〃Of course；〃 I said； my voice blank with surprise at his question。 Of course I
wanted to go back。
Jacob's face hardened while I stared at him； congealing into the bitter mask
that I'd thought was gone for
good。 Just before he had the mask in place； I caught the spasm of betrayal
that flashed in his eyes。 His
hands were still shaking。 He looked ten years older than me。
He took a deep breath。 〃You're sure it's not a trick？〃 he asked in a slow；
heavy voice。
〃It's not a trick。 It's Carlisle。 Take me back！〃
A shudder rippled through his wide shoulders； but his eyes were flat and
emotionless。 〃No。〃
〃Jake； it's okay—〃
〃No。 Take yourself back； Bella。〃 His voice was a slap—I flinched as the sound
of it struck me。 His jaw
clenched and unclenched。
〃Look； Bella；〃 he said in the same hard voice。 〃I can't go back。 Treaty or no
treaty； that's my enemy in
there。〃
〃It's not like that—〃
〃I have to tell Sam right away。 This changes things。 We can't be caught on
their territory。〃
〃Jake； it's not a war！〃
He didn't listen。 He put the truck in neutral and jumped out the door； leaving
it running。
〃Bye； Bella；〃 he called back over his shoulder。 〃I really hope you don't die。〃
He sprinted into the
darkness； shaking so hard that his shape seemed blurred； he disappeared before
I could open my mouth
to call him back。
Remorse pinned me against the seat for one long second。 What had I just done
to Jacob'？
But remorse couldn't hold me very long。
I slid across the seat and put the truck back in drive。 My hands were shaking
almost as hard as Jake's
had been； and this took a minute of concentration。 Then I carefully turned the
truck around and drove it
back to my house。
It was very dark when I turned off the headlights。 Charlie had left in such a
hurry that he'd forgotten to
leave the porch lamp on。 I felt a pang of doubt； staring at the house； deep in
shadow。 What if it was a
trick？
I looked back at the black car； almost invisible in the night。 No。 I knew that
car。
Still； my hands were shaking even worse than before as I reached for the key
above the door。 When I
grabbed the doorknob to unlock it； it twisted easily under my hand。 I let the
door fall open。 The hallway
was black。
I wanted to call out a greeting； but my throat was too dry。 I couldn't quite
seem to catch my breath。
I took a step inside and fumbled for the light switch。 It was so black—like
the black water Where was
that switch？
Just like the black water； with the orange flame flickering impossibly on top
of it。 Flame that couldn't be a
fire； but what then ？ My fingers traced the wall； still searching； still
shaking—
Suddenly； something Jacob had told me this afternoon echoed in my head；
finally sinking in She took
off into the water； he'd said。 The bloodsuckers have the advantage there。
That's why I raced home
—I was afraid she was going to double back swimming。
My hand froze in its searching； my whole body froze into place； as I realized
why I recognized the
strange orange color on the water。
Victoria's hair； blowing wild in the wind； the color of fire
She'd been right there。 Right there in the harbor with me and Jacob。 If Sam
hadn't been there； if it had
been just the two of us ？ I couldn't breathe or move。
The light flicked on； though my frozen hand had still not found the switch。
I blinked into the sudden light； and saw that someone was there； waiting for
me。
17。 VISITOR
UNNATURALLY STILL AND WHITE； WITH LARGE BLACK EYES intent on my face； my
visitor
waited perfectly motionless in the center of the halt； beautiful beyond
imagining。
My knees trembled for a second； and I nearly fell。 Then I hurled myself at
her。
〃Alice； oh； Alice！〃 I cried； as I slammed into her。
I'd forgotten how hard she was； it was like running headlong into a wall of
cement。
〃Bella？〃 There was a strange mingling of relief and confusion in her voice。
I locked my arms around her； gasping to inhale as much of the scent of her
skin as possible。 It wasn't like
anything else—not floral or spice； citrus or musk。 No perfume in the world
could pare。 My memory
hadn't done it justice。
I didn't notice when the gasping turned into something else—I only realized I
was sobbing when Alice
dragged me to the living room couch and pulled me into her lap。 It was like
curling up into a cool stone；
but a stone that was contoured fortingly to the shape of my body。 She
rubbed my back in a gentle
rhythm； waiting for me to get control of myself。
〃I'm sorry；〃 I blubbered。 〃I'm just so happy to see you！〃
〃It's okay； Bella。 Everything's okay。〃
〃Yes；〃 I bawled。 And； for once； it seemed that way。
Alice sighed。 〃I'd forgotten how exuberant you are；〃 she said； and her tone
was disapproving。
I looked up at her through my streaming eyes。 Alice's neck was tight；
straining away from me； her lips
pressed together firmly。 Her eyes were black as pitch。
〃Oh；〃 I puffed； as I realized the problem。 She was thirsty。 And I smelled
appetizing。 It had been a while
since I'd had to think about that kind of thing。 〃Sorry。〃
〃It's my own fault。 It's been too long since I hunted。 I shouldn't let myself
get so thirsty。 But I was in a
hurry today。〃 The look she directed at me then was a glare。 〃Speaking of
which； would you like to
explain to me how you're alive？〃
That brought me up short and stopped the sobs。 I realized what must have
happened immediately； and
why Alice was here。
I swallowed loudly。 〃You saw me fall。〃
〃No；〃 she disagreed； her eyes narrowing。 〃I saw you jump。〃
I pursed my lips as I tried to think of an explanation that wouldn't sound
nuts。
Alice shook her head。 〃I told him this would happen； but he didn't believe me。
'Bella promised；'〃 her
voice imitated his so perfectly that I iroze in shock while the pain ripped
through my torso。 〃'Don't be
looking for her future； either；'〃 she continued to quote him。 '〃We've done
enough damage。〃
〃But just because I'm not looking； doesn't mean I don't see〃 she went on。 〃I
wasn't keeping tabs on you；
I swear； Bella。 It's just that I'm alreacy attuned to you when I saw you
jumping； I didn't think； I just got
on a plane。 I knew I would be too late； but I couldn't do nothing。 And then I
get here； thinking maybe I
could help Charlie somehow； and you drive up。〃 She shook her head； this time
in confusion。 Her voice
was strained。 〃I saw you go into the water and I waited and waited for you to
e up； but you didn't。
What happened？ And how could you do that to Charlie？ Did you stop to think
what this would do to
him？ And my brother？ D