Jacob laughed； his body shook under me。
“Aren’t you worried about Saturday at all？” I asked。
He turned his enormous head toward me； so that I could see one of his eyes roll。
“I wish I could feel that positive。”
He leaned his head against my leg and started humming again。 And it did make me feel just a little bit
better。
“So we’ve got some hiking to do tomorrow； I guess。”
He rumbled； the sound was enthusiastic。
“It might be a long hike；” I warned him。 “Edward doesn’t judge distances the way a normal person does。”
Jacob barked another laugh。
I settled deeper into his warm fur； resting my head against his neck。
It was strange。 Even though he was in this bizarre form； this felt more like the way Jake and I used to be
— the easy； effortless friendship that was as natural as breathing in and out — than the last few times I’d been
with Jacob while he was human。 Odd that I should find that again here； when I’d thought this wolf thing was
the cause of its loss。
The killing games continued in the clearing； and I stared at the hazy moon。
20。 PROMISE
EVERYTHING WAS READY。
I was packed for my twoday visit with “Alice；” and my bag waited for me on the passenger seat of my
truck。 I’d given the concert tickets to Angela； Ben； and Mike。 Mike was going to take Jessica； which was
exactly as I’d hoped。 Billy had borrowed Old Quil Ateara’s boat and invited Charlie down for some open sea
fishing before the afternoon game started。 Collin and Brady； the two youngest werewolves； were staying
behind to protect La Push — though they were just children； both of them only thirteen。 Still； Charlie would be
safer than anyone left in Forks。
I had done all that I could do。 I tried to accept that； and put the things that were outside of my control out
of my head； for tonight at least。 One way or another； this would all be over in fortyeight hours。 The thought
was almost forting。
Edward had requested that I relax； and I was going to do my best。
“For this one night； could we try to forget everything besides just you and me？” he’d pleaded； unleashing
the full force of his eyes on me。 “It seems like I can never get enough time like that。 I need to be with you。 Just
you。”
That was not a hard request to agree to； though I knew that forgetting my fears would be much easier said
than done。 Other matters were on my mind now； knowing that we had this night to be alone； and that would
help。
There were some things that had changed。
For instance； I was ready。
I was ready to join his family and his world。 The fear and guilt and anguish I was feeling now had taught
me that much。 I’d had a chance to concentrate on this — as I’d gazed at the moon through the clouds and
rested against a werewolf — and I knew I would not panic again。 The next time something came at us； I
would be ready。 An asset； not a liability。 He would never have to make the choice between me and his family
again。 We would be partners； like Alice and Jasper。 Next time； I would do my part。
I would wait for the sword to be removed from over my head； so that Edward would be satisfied。 But it
wasn’t necessary。 I was ready。
There was only one missing piece。
One piece； because there were some things that had not changed； and that included the desperate way I
loved him。 I’d had plenty of time to think through the ramifications of Jasper and Emmett’s bet — to figure out
the things I was willing to lose with my humanity； and the part that I was not willing to give up。 I knew which
human experience I was going to insist on before I became inhuman。
So we had some things to work out tonight。 After everything I’d seen in the past two years； I didn’t
believe in the word impossible anymore。 It was going to take more than that to stop me now。
Okay； well； honestly； it was probably going to be much more plicated than that。 But I was going to
try。
As decided as I was； I wasn’t surprised that I still felt nervous as I drove down the long path to his house
— I didn’t know how to do what I was trying to do； and that guaranteed me some serious jitters。 He sat in the
passenger seat； fighting a smile at my slow pace。 I was surprised that he hadn’t insisted on taking the wheel；
but tonight he seemed content to go at my speed。
It was after dark when we reached the house。 In spite of that； the meadow was bright in the light shining
from every window。
As soon as I cut the engine he was at my door； opening it for me。 He lifted me from the cab with one arm；
slinging my bag out of the truck bed and over his shoulder with the other。 His lips found mine as I heard him
kick the truck’s door shut behind me。
Without breaking the kiss； he swung me up so that I was cradled in his arms and carried me into the
house。
Was the front door already open？ I didn’t know。 We were inside； though； and I was dizzy。 I had to
remind myself to breathe。
This kissing did not frighten me。 It wasn’t like before when I could feel the fear and panic leaking through
his control。 His lips were not anxious； but enthusiastic now — he seemed as thrilled as I was that we had
tonight to concentrate on being together。 He continued to kiss me for several minutes； standing there in the
entry； he seemed less guarded than usual； his mouth cold and urgent on mine。
I began to feel cautiously optimistic。 Perhaps getting what I wanted would not be as difficult as I’d
expected it to be。
No； of course it was going to be just exactly that difficult。
With a low chuckle； he pulled me away； holding me at arm’s length。
“Wele home；” he said； his eyes liquid and warm。
“That sounds nice；” I said； breathless。
He set me gently on my feet。 I wrapped both my arms around him； refusing to allow any space between
us。
“I have something for you；” he said； his tone conversational。
“Oh？”
“Your handmedown； remember？ You said that was allowable。”
“Oh； that’s right。 I guess I did say that。”
He chuckled at my reluctance。
“It’s up in my room。 Shall I go get it？”
His bedroom？ “Sure；” I agreed； feeling quite devious as I wound my fingers through his。 “Let’s go。”
He must have been eager to give me my nonpresent； because human velocity was not fast enough for
him。 He scooped me up again and nearly flew up the stairs to his room。 He set me down at the door； and
darted into his closet。
He was back before I’d taken a step； but I ignored him and went to the huge gold bed； plopping down on
the edge and then sliding to the center。 I curled up in a ball； my arms wrapped around my knees。
“Okay；” I grumbled。 Now that I was where I wanted to be； I could afford a little reluctance。 “Let me have
it。”
Edward laughed。
He climbed onto the bed to sit next to me； and my heart thumped unevenly。 Hopefully he would write that
off as some reaction to him giving me presents。
“A handmedown；” he reminded me sternly。 He pulled my left wrist away from my leg； and touched the
silver bracelet for just a moment。 Then he gave me my arm back。
I examined it cautiously。 On the opposite side of the chain from the wolf； there now hung a brilliant heart
shaped crystal。 It was cut in a million facets； so that even in the subdued light shining from the lamp； it
sparkled。 I inhaled in a low gasp。
“It was my mother’s。” He shrugged deprecatingly。 “I inherited quite a few baubles like this。 I’ve given
some to Esme and Alice both。 So； clearly； this is not a big deal in any way。”
I smiled ruefully at his assurance。
“But I thought it was a good representation；” he continued。 “It’s hard and cold。” He laughed。 “And it
throws rainbows in the sunlight。”
“You forgot the most important similarity；” I murmured。 “It’s beautiful。”
“My heart is just as silent；” he mused。 “And it； too； is yours。”
I twisted my wrist so the heart would glimmer。 “Thank you。 For both。”
“No； thank you。 It’s a relief to have you accept a gift so easily。 Good practice for you； too。” He grinned；
flashing his teeth。
I leaned into him； ducking my head under his arm and cuddling into his side。 It probably felt similar to
snuggling with Michelangelo’s David； except that this perfect marble creature wrapped his arms around me to
pull me closer。
It seemed like a good place to start。
“Can we discuss something？ I’d appreciate it if you could begin by being openminded。”
He hesitated for a moment。 “I’ll give it my best effort；” he agreed； cautious now。
“I’m not breaking any rules here；” I promised。 “This is strictly about you and me。” I cleared my throat。 “So
。 。 。 I was impressed by how well we were able to promise the other night。 I was thinking I would like to
apply the same principle to a different situation。” I wondered why I was being so formal。 Must be the nerves。
“What would you like to negotiate？” he asked； a smile in his voice。
I struggled； trying to find exactly the right words to open with。
“Listen to your heart fly；” he murmured。 “It’s fluttering like a hummingbird’s wings。 Are you all right？”
“I’m great。”
“Please go on then；” he encouraged。
“Well； I guess； first； I wanted to talk to you about that whole ridiculous marriage condition thing。”
“It’s only ridiculous to you。 What about it？”
“I was wondering 。 。 。 is that open to negotiation？”
Edward frowned； serious now。 “I’ve already made the largest concession by far and away — I’ve agreed
to take your life away against my better judgment。 And that ought to entitle me to a few promises on your
part。”
“No。” I shook my head； focusing on keeping my face posed。 “That part’s a done deal。 We’re not
discussing my 。 。 。 renovations right now。 I want to hammer out some other details。”
He looked at me suspiciously。 “Which details do you mean exactly？”
I hesitated。 “Let’s clarify your prerequisites first。”
“You know what I want。”
“Matrimony。” I made it sound like a dirty word。
“Yes。” He smiled a wide smile。 “To start with。”
The shock spoiled my carefully posed expression。 “There’s more？”
“Well；” he said； and his face was calculating。 “If you’re my wife； t